No pictures? Dave is lame.

Due to difficulties of a technical nature, there shall be no photos tonight. Sorry. Our computer was acting up, and like so many problems in my life I've decided to simply shut it down, go to bed, and assume things will magically fix themselves whilst I slumber.

We went to IKEA this morning, which is about as dull an anecdote as you can possibly drum up, except for the part where I bent down to pick up Abby and split a 12 inch gash in the back of my jeans. It was a great day to wear dark underwear and be carrying a diaper bag.

The girls were big fans of the toddler beds while we were there, and it makes me wonder if the cribs' days are numbered.

After a quick lunch and a truncated nap, we headed to the Art Sled Rally with Chris and Emily and Ella. It was fun, but we got there late and left a little early because it was rather chilly for the girls. By pure luck, we happened to stand right next to the green mouse sled that I'd taken a picture of last year for Poho365 (I put that photo up on last Saturday), so I got to meet the guy in the photo for the first time. It was a nice moment.

Kids were cute today, by and large. Lots of laughs and good times, up until the end when they turned evil. I'm not sure if I can blame them, as they were probably tired since we did wake them early from their nap; they get a freebie for that.

Day three hundred and forty eight.

Perro Agua

I just spent a couple minutes looking at old blog posts, which leaves me astounded at how long their hair is now. So long!

Today Jen and the girls were talking to Aunt Christy on the phone. At the very end, Jen implored them to say goodbye, and Lily replied with, "Aunt Tooshie." Jen asked for a clarification, and she repeated, "Aunt Tooshie!!" So that's Aunt Christy's new name. (and if she doesn't remember this, Jen says she had probably just hung up and might not have caught it)

Another fun Lily moment - and by fun I mean "shocking" and "disturbing" and "call-social-services-worthy" - came this evening, when she, for reasons known only to her, plopped in front of the dog's water dish and dunked her face in the water to drink. I have to be honest, I didn't really react as quickly as I could have, because it was really, really funny, and what harm could come of letting your kid drink dog water?

For the record, both kids have some bizarre and illogical eating habits these days. I feel terrible about all the food we waste, but seriously, they and their hunger cannot be predicted. When I got home today, they were having a snack of green beans, because who doesn't like to much on green beans while dancing to the Wiggles? Abby wasn't eating much. When asked a few times, her answers were, "No", "Noooo", and "For the love of god, no!" My attention was then diverted for a minute or so. When I turned back she had the whole bowl of beans in her mouth and was making a move for Lily's bowl, which she did dispatch with great authority. She asked for more, we gave them to her, she ate 'em. She must have eaten almost a half a pound of beans. Strange that she was so gassy later.

Day three hundred and forty seven.

Lily crawled all the way under the crib for the first time. She thought it was hilarious.

Abby loves hanging in Liy's crib and reading stories.

Yup.

Perspective

Maybe not the best picture of either of them, but it's one of those rare moments these days when we can get both of them in the same shot.

Dave is out, sampling some beer and tasting some food at a friend's house, so I thought I'd do him a favor and blog tonight. I'm not feeling very bloggy though because I'm quite tired. This is partly because I got up at the crack of dawn in order to go to my soon-to-be work to meet some people and discuss what I'll be doing there. It might also be partly due to the fact that it is exhausting trying to keep up with two toddlers every day. But I think it is mainly due to the fact that I followed up my morning meeting by going to a funeral for my childhood friend's infant son, an event that is quite draining.

Attending a funeral for a baby is one of those times in life in which you just can't come up with the right things to say, no matter how much you want to. What I think I've learned from our past experience with this (when we lost a niece about two and a half years ago) is that it is important just to be there and to acknowledge that it has happened. Not just when it happened, but through the passing of time as well. So I'll take this opportunity to tell you (you know who you are), that I think of Elizabeth often and I always will. I think if it were me, I think I'd want to know her memory lived on. But then again, I can't imagine what I'd want.

What I will say is that these events help me to put things into perspective and to remember that we are so lucky to have Abby and Lily. Just thinking about it makes me want to go wake them up and hug them. I won't though. I'm not crazy.

As for the girls (they are why you read this blog, right?), they had a lovely time playing with Uncle Steve and their cousin Oliver (and Maya for a short time before she had to go to school). They were so exhausted afterward that I had to wake them from their nap later so that they didn't sleep all the way to bedtime. Thanks for taking good care of them Steve!

Day three hundred and forty six

I love that face.

Olly making sure Lily is alright. Or checking to find out if she is edible.

Lily attempting a somersault. She has some work to do.

A non-post

Do not look directly at her face, lest you turn to stone. That is a heinous glare.

Tonight was hockey night. Hockey night is itself not a notable event; however, it should go down on public record that my father in law Neil strapped on the skates and came out to show us a thing or two. He has some pretty mad skills with the stick.

That's going to be it for today. I'm sorry, but I'm exhausted and tired and sleepy and my tummy hurts. That's right, my tummy.

I will add a story from Jen. She was out with some friends last week when a couple guys got up to go to the bathroom. Wanting to make light of the fact that two guys were going together, she said, "You guys are going potty together!" I don't think 'potty' was her first choice of words, yet there it was. You can take the parent away from the kids, but you can't take the kids away of the parents...or something.

Day three hundred and forty five.

Dancing! Her method her was to crouch....crouch...then STAND UP REAL FAST!

Sporting the lid.

She kept saying, "Daaaaddddyyyyy!"

Candid camera

Monkey face.

Happy monkey

I can't believe how little I wanted a video camera in the girls' room before they were born, and how badly I want one now. In case you're not sure what I'm talking about, they make cameras that you can mount in your kid's room and wire to (or make wireless magic with) your television. A click of the remote, and WHAMMO...there's your kid. Jen's sister and husband have this for their kids, and at the time I thought it was cool, but it didn't make the cut when we were (quite frugally) preparing for parenthood.

For almost two years, I've stood by that decision, because infants are criminally boring. Now, things are different. Now our kids stay up, on average, about an hour after we put them down for both naps and night-night, and we can hear the most magical and mysterious and confounding sounds from those monitors. It drives me batty with wonder to think about what is happening up there.

Jen reports that the girls were making strange kissy noises, followed closely by riotous laughter, today during naptime. She could only laugh and smile and leave the rest to her imagination, because opening that door and trying to get the most cursory of peeks would break the spell. When they're awake and giggling at each other in their cribs, it is truly magical, but like the proverbial apple from the naughty tree, you're not allowed to look in, or else all is ruined.

I have to revisit the camera thing. It just might be worth it now.

Day three hundred and forty four.

Yaaaaaaaaaaay!!! Count yourself lucky, because you are looking at the very moment of me coming home from work. Anarchy! Lily ran at me initially, then ran away because the excitement was simply too much.

Abby ran at me as well at first, then stepped back to play air guitar??

Jen is cool.

Ever wonder how muffins get made? This ain't it.

How awesome is Jen? Spends all day with the kids, makes muffins with the kids, AND gets pictures of the kids. She's a superwoman. I'm not sure, but I think somewhere in here she definitely cleaned the kids, too; when I came home their hair was slightly damp and smelled like flowers instead of the usual peanut butter and pasta sauce.

In further praise of my raven-haired spouse, those muffins turned out really good.

Tonight Lily was playing golf with Jen (this ought to make both her grandfathers quite proud). Jen said, "Okay, it's time for night night." Lily's response to this was to push Jen out of the golfing area, then turn to me and say, "Daddy! Daddy play!" Clever girl. You know the old saying...if your eye is your problem then cut it out. And if Mommy is making you go night night, banish her to the couch and bring Daddy in. Didn't work, of course, since I informed her that I will be siding with Mommy almost all the time.

Thanks to all of you who wrote a few days ago about the "monster" episode; I know it's not easy to craft a response to a downer story like that. We're very grateful. So is Abby.

Day three hundred and forty three.

Aaaaahhhhhhhhhh...muffin!

Clean up, clean up, everybody do your share.

A good cook always samples.

Go Vikings!! Oh....er.....Go USA in the world cup!

NOT a recent photo.

I'm not sure if there's an unwritten rule of blogging that excuses me from writing after the heartbreaking Vikings' loss I just bore witness to. Sigh. Of course, it's only sports, but c'mon, really...sigh. That super bowl was within a tantalizingly close reach.

So I'm now eagerly anticipating the first US match of the world cup, a match which will pit us against our former oppressors, the hated English Empire. This is going to put me in a bit of a quandry, because if you follow the org chart of my company from me to my boss, all the way to the top, it's British all the way (if you're curious what would happen if you were to follow it downward, you would just find the bottom of the page). The question, then, is this: do I wear my Demarcus Beasly jersey the day of the match and suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous demotions? I've to June to work it out.

Today's photos feature some kids that are markedly younger than the ones you may have come to know. These were taken last February the 7th, a mere week before their first birthday (ahh, what a careless and blog-free existence I enjoyed...), and I'm including them today for two reasons:

1. I am way short on recent pictures, and
2. The Powderhorn Art Sled Rally is just 6 days away, and you should go!

I took these shots at the rally last year for Powderhorn365, and it was a lot of fun. Basically anyone can build a crazy sled and send it sailing down the hill at our local park. Many of these sleds are of dubious construction, yet use surprising and dangerously dense materials, ensuring no shortage of exciting moments when sleds go careening into the crowd. 'Tis at Powderhorn, next Saturday, 2pm. http://www.artsledrally.com/ We will be in attendance, despite it taking place PRECISELY at nap time. Who schedules these things?

This morning we made a stop at Sovereign Grounds coffee shop, which I can't say enough good things about. If you happened to read about the MSP cop that was just busted robbing a bunch of places around the metro area, this was one of the places he hit, which begs the question: what moron thinks there's good money in robbing a coffee shop? Anyway, they had monkey bread for sale today and it was disastrously good. As always, the other parents and kids were a source of good socializin'.

Afterwards, Rainbow Foods was privvy to our gracious presence for a bit. Exciting, as it was the first time we had them running loose around the grocer's instead of strapped into the carts. Jen had a funny (in hindsight) moment when she was trying to teach Abby a lesson on walking around without watching where she was going. I'm not sure if I'm getting the exact quote right, but she said something like, "Abby, you're going to get hit." This happened right as a woman was turning the corner, and only after she gave Jen a rather angry look did she realize that it sounded like she was threatening to actually strike Abby. Feels kinda like a Curb Your Enthusiasm moment. If she were Larry David, she would have followed the woman home to explain and made things, somehow, a thousand times worse..

We pushed the nap schedule a bit, so when we got home, it was going to be a quick snack and into bed. Moments away from heading up, Lily got a random and sourceless nosebleed that was literally pouring out of her. We couldn't really pull the kleenex away without having instant blood on the carpet, furniture, cat, whatever happened to be under her. This shouldn't have been a huge deal - she has a certain proclivity for nosebleeds, maybe it's thin capillaries - since all we had to do was sit there and hold a kleenex under her schnoz. In theory. However, she is a toddler, and she does not bend to the will of her parents. She fought us tooth and nail. In retrospect, it was kinda funny because it should have been simple to sit with her on our lap, but she was thrashing around, spraying blood everywhere (I'm going to exaggerate this right into a Tarantino movie), and we could barely contain her. Good lord, it was a nightmare for all of us.

She eventually lost enough blood that she just got light headed and sleepy, so we just put her down with gauze on her face.

Kidding.

It stopped, as all nosebleeds do, but it took a while, and it was messy; in the end, she napped like a rockstar. Still, I do NOT recommend this method of putting your kid down.

Day three hundred and forty two.

Look at all my hair!

This may likely remain one of the better pictures I'll ever take.

The official sled launcher/guider of the rally.