No more guy time for me.

The Duluth crew went for a little stroll today. Abby was sporting the new high-tech uniform that the 2012 US Olympic Track team will be wearing. Pure speed!

I'm officially back on blog duty. (this is Dave). Jen steered the Soobaru back to the house around 8:30 tonight, and I got to reunite with the kids. Yaaaaaaayythey couldn't have cared less. Lily seemed pretty interested in me for a second, then clamored to be back with Mommy. So I took Abby, who promptly tore open with some horrendous screaming.

To be honest, I don't think it was me. She is still suffering from the occasional bout of gassiness, so she was a little tooty and fussy for a bit. After a while, she felt better, and just before we brought them up for night-night, she buried her head into my shoulder, let me stroke her cheek, and quickly closed her eyes and fell asleep. So that's pretty much the best way for them to come home.

I'd like to publicly thank Jen for being the coolest person ever by giving me a couple kid-less days to do nothing at all. It was lovely, and I can't wait to return the favor, as soon as I find someone to take the kids for a couple days.

I made some chili tonight to bring over to Tracey and Mark's tomorrow. I must, after at least 10 handwashings, still have some residual pepper on my fingers, because I just rubbed my eye and apparently put raw capsaicin right on my iris. It does not feel good.

Day three hundred and thirty four.

Mush, grandpa!

Abs getting a lice check from Elly

4 mittens. None on her hands.

Watch me please

I just got back from having a drink with Sara, my friend/freshman year college roommate, and I'm tired. So tonight's blog will rely mainly on providing a few of today's tidbits and a few photos.

My mom and I packed up the girls and brought them to visit my grandmother, Nana. The kids generally enjoy these visits because Nana has a great collection of stuffed animals, many of which move and talk. Today was no exception. The girls had a great time and were well-behaved. The highlight was definitely when Lily was practicing her zipping skills by zipping my mom's vest up and down. In mid-zip she turned around yelling "Nana", to make sure that Nana was watching her. It was the first time she'd referred to Nana by name and it was really sweet. I think they sometimes get confused about Nana's name, because that is what they call bananas as well--but so far they haven't tried to eat her, so that's good.

That was the big outing for the day. The rest involved napping, eating, reading, playing, eating, etc. You get the gist. It was a good day but we all miss Dave/daddy.

Day three hundred thirty three.

Abby wearing her new apron--I love the dollar section at Target!

Lily explaining how to read a receipt.Abby with Grandpa, playing peek-a-boo.
Grandma let Lily play on her computer. PBS/ Sesame Street have some great games for kids to play if you're willing to let them slam their hands repeatedly on your keyboard and occasionally press the right keys for the game.

Hello, we're the Wiggles, we'd like to say hello to you...

Greetings from Duluth. All Dave wanted for Christmas was some free time--as I think any parent at one time or another can relate to. Fortunately, Grandma and Grandpa were more than willing to take in their grandchildren (and me) for a few days, so I packed up the car and here we are.

The drive was uneventful and much easier than the last few drives have been--even though the last few have been tag-teamed between Dave and I. What made the difference? I caved in and bought a portable DVD player for car trips. I should be note that this was something Dave had every intention of avoiding forever. It was one thing to borrow one for the road trip to Cincinnati this past summer, as well as for our recent plane trip, but to actually own one and admit that this is a tactic that will be used again in the future was something that I think pained him a little. But out of love for me and the realization that stopping me from making this purchase could result in unpleasantness for him or perhaps the forfeit of his free time, Dave gave me his blessing to cave and get our own player. And let me tell you, it was worth it. WORTH IT!

I appreciate Dave's argument against the car DVD player. He has fond memories of car trips as a kid--reading, playing games, singing and whatnot. I have those memories too. One of my favorite car trips had my sister and I in the way back of the station wagon and my little brother in a sleeping bag lying across the back seat. If we were behaved for a certain length of time, we'd get a present or special treat. It was great fun. But there are three important things to note about that scenario which explain why I am so willing to throw away those potential child memories: 1) I was old enough to remember that trip. I have no recollection of any trips when I was only 23 months old, 2) where were the car seats and seat belts in my car trip memories? I'll tell you where--nonexistent. It was a different world and I wasn't forced to sit in one position for three hours straight, 3) the technology for a portable DVD player didn't exist then (even VHS was only just blossoming and I don't think it had made its way to cars yet) but I can guarantee that if it did exist and if it was affordable, my parents would have had one. Who wants to ride in a car for three days with three kids and sing the whole time? Ugh.

Some of you are thinking, 'yeah, but there's a big difference between a three-day car trip and a three-hour one'. You're right. But I don't care. Still worth it. They were quiet and smiling for two of the three hours. And there was still singing--I just wasn't the one leading it (gotta love the Wiggles, they love to sing!) And even though the magic only lasted two hours, the last hour was tolerable, even with Lily testing her pipes to see whether or not she could break the window with her voice alone, because I still had my patience left. And I had crackers. Always have crackers is something I learned with Abby along time ago. It never ceases to amaze me how much such a little person can eat.

Sorry about the lack of pictures. I forgot to pull out the camera today. I'll make up for it tomorrow.

Day three hundred and thirty two.

The dastardly peek.

A couple leftover shots from the Conservatory last weekend. I had to use a really fast shutter speed to get the sloth...he's speedy.

Last night, our little peek in on the girls went horribly awry. It was a bizarre sequence of events.

We opened the door and crept in, like we have so many times with no hiccups. Jen was in about three steps, and I'd just started to cross the threshold, when Lily SPRUNG HER TRAP! (exciting, no?) She leapt to her feet and yelled, "Mommy! Daddy!" I think there might have been an, "Olly!" in there too, maybe; I forget.

We both knew it was only a matter of time until the peek would backfire tragically on us. I can only guess that Lily was already up, and completely silent...waiting...waiting. Her little ambush was so sudden and lucid, she had to already have been up.

Knowing better than to even flirt with the idea of holding her and putting her back to bed - she was wiiide awake - we dragged her onto our bed and gave her some milk. It was nice, but she was fidgety and hyper, and we were preoccupied trying to process why this was happening to us.

Before long, Abby started a little whining and chattering over the monitor. After a few minutes, it had gotten worse, and worse, and then she suddenly burst out in a wailful, soulful, painful cry. Admitting defeat, we went and got her and brought both of the morons downstairs.

Not to spoil the ending, but it must have been gas. Abby was miserable, she would writh and scream in pain, tears streaming, for a good few minutes, inconsolable, then she'd be okay. After a couple of these, I started to notice that she would emit a barely-audible toot right before she returned to normal, and we had an "a-ha" moment.

Oddly, Lily was just as, if not more, gassy. She had some memorable toots. But in contrast to her sister, she thought it was hilarious. Maybe the gassy bug doesn't make her tummy hurt. Abby was in serious pain.

After 40 minutes or so, they both settled down and we brought them back to bed, vowing to never again peek in on the kids.

Day three hundred and thirty one.

Leftover photos...enjoy!

Speaking for Jen: oy

Abs sporting a hat. Indoors. Which is crazy! Except that our house is 39 degrees, so it's really not that crazy.

I called Jen at 1:30 today to ask how the day was. She told me. I considered not coming home.

To sum up, the girlies were little hellions for most of the day. This makes me twinge with guilt at having spent my day at work - a veritable vacation, by comparison - while Jen spent her Tuesday doling out time-outs, out-lasting tantrums, force-clothing kids, and having a rough time in general. Poor Jen.

There is a jocular, daddly part of me that thinks their moods will change instantly when I come home, that they'll run to me and give me hugs and be stand-up, law-abiding kids because we're a whole family again. That didn't quite happen; for a second day now, they considered my entrance with guarded apathy. And while they didn't really reach the crescendo of madness that they had during the day, they were hardly daisies during the nighttime. Cranky and edgy. Bipolar might be a good way to put it, as I had them belly laughing one second, then bawling the next.

In unrelated news, Abby is trying her best to drown herself, or at least concuss herself smartly. This is because she has taken a strong liking to lying on her back in the bath. For most of the bath, she sits and is fine, but then we lie her back to rinse her hair off. No biggie; she loves it and thinks it's hilarious and splashes all of us with her legs. However, we've found that when we pull her back up into a sitting position, she just throws herself backwards, thinking our hands are still present to guide her safely back to prone. 'Downright frightening' is a good way to describe this. Jen caught her at it last bathtime, and tonight I caught her a couple times, then she did it again and I missed and she bonked on the side of the bath. Hopefully it taught her a lesson, but probably not.

Day three hundred and thirty.

Hat time for both the chipmunks.

"From this day to the ending of the world, but we in it shall be remembered;
we few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
for he today that sheds his blood with me shall be my brother;
be he ne'er so vile
This day shall gentle his condition and gentlemen in England now a-bed shall think
themselves accurs'd they were not here,
and hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks
that fought with us upon Saint Crispin's day."

(It just has a Henry V feel to it, does it not?)

Mommy and the girls made cookies today. They were both tasty and lickable.

Mommy at home.

Run away, wee Lily.

Today = Jenner's first day of stay-at-homeytude with the The Dynamic Duo. As she's in for several weeks of this, she was hoping to get it all off to a rousing good start. I came home to find her with her wits still about her - or, at the very least, accessible in a pinch - and am thus under the impression that she just MIGHT survive the duration.

Her time at home will come to an end in March, when she starts work at EcoLab. I don't think I've written about her new job on the blog yet; I was under strict orders not to peep a word until she had officially accepted, and it took her just shy of 109 days to accept because she was so busy with finals. Yup, so Jen has a jobby job to look forward to come March, which I can say with no humor at all is a very, very fortunate thing for us, considering the state of the world. It should come as no surprise, also, that I am bonkers with pride for her and her job getting acumen; she truly is a remarkable person. Hooray for Jen! And for me, who gets to benefit from her job by default!

It seems strange to contribute here, since Jen spent all day at home with the kids, making her barometer that much more keen than mine. However, since this little venture was my idea at the outset, I feel like, if I were to suggest that she start writing the entries for the next month, I will undoubtedly find myself with twin girls coming to work with me. So I won't do that.

I will say how ecstatically nice it is to leave for work, then just go to work. No strapping kids into the car, no getting punched in the face for stealing 'fires, no screaming or ridiculousness, no drama for passing by day car for a better spot down the block, no any of it. I just get in the car and...drive. Which is saying alot, since I hate driving.

Coming home is super, as well. I skip all the same stuff, but played out in reverse. Now I get to walk in the house empty handed and bask in the glow of the kids coming to meet me. They didn't do that today, of course - Lily was instantly distracted and angered because I was carrying a gallon of milk, and Abby seemed intent on only playing Ring Around the Rosies - but I imagine they'll get the hang of a proper greeting soon.

Day three hundred and twenty nine.

Spoonball!

Craziness!

Abby grabbing herself right where I stuck her with a tranquilizer.

OCD time.

Teaching your kid to rock. Lesson 1: How to properly drool on a guitar.

Another successful day of not leaving the house! This was by design, particularly in the morning, which we'd carved out as "jammie and free play time". The afternoon I was going to go running, but I left some things - notably, my long underwear - out in the car, and I couldn't swallow putting on 0 degree long underwear to go run in 0 degree weather. However, I do still have to go out and switch some car seats around, which will mark my first time stepping out of our drafty little cottage.

A day devoid of leaving the house is going to make for a predictably dull blog post.

I can proudly report that the kids were a lot more chilled out and normal today. No epic struggles between us and them; just the usual minute-by-minute tiny tugs-of-war between us on who, exactly, runs the show.

Lily has begun a new and exciting Routine Phase. Rather than explain it, I'll paint it for you with an example: Last week, Jen wore her brown coat four mornings in a row when she helped bring the girls out to the car before day care. On the fifth day, she put on her blue coat. This was unacceptable to Lily, who shrieked and howled until the appropriate coat was donned.

I'm not sure, but I have a feeling this part of her psyche is one and the same with the one that cries foul when Jen and I have physical contact (which happened again tonight, this time just because I was touching the chair Jen was in. "Nooooo!" cried Lily, while we amusingly tried to figure out what she was unhappy with).

This is an interesting phase, at least it is for her, since her approach to it is so scattershot. We were slightly concerned that we would be changing cribs on her, thinking she might not be totally on board with it and would dole us out a measured and furious response...something along the lines of two or three sleepless nights. But she didn't miss a beat, no problems, smooth sailing. It's bizarre that she would get so wound up about the jacket Jen throws on in the heat of our helter skelter morning routine, yet a bed change goes unnoticed completely by her. At least, I think it was unnoticed. She didn't say anything, like, "Hey, new bed!"

Abby could care less about any of it. Jen could put on a tube top and zubas with a turban on her head, and she would carry on like a clam.

Day three hundred and twenty eight.

Closeups of dinner time!!! GAAAHH!

Yuuuuuuuuuck!

Lily at the conservatory, conserving.