I think I made a big mistake

Jen is officially in Oslo, as of the email I got this morning at 5:27. Oslo. Crazy. Sounds nice. I bet there's a Chili's right there in the hotel.

Blog entries are going to be sporadic, hopefully more numerous since I'm going to use this to update Jenner on the idiots. I'm essentially writing this to JJ now. Stay tuned for more trans-Atlantic newscasting!

(..beginning second person tense..)

Yesterday I picked the kids up from daycare and was immediately under the impression that we'd made a huge mistake sending you to Europe. The girls were miserable, absolutely shell-shockingly bad. Abby is obviously back under the weather a bit, and was howling appropriately to voice her unhappiness. I was (ineffectually) pouring attention on her, and of course Lily was agonizing that I wasn't agonizing over her instead. So she began howling as well.

The walk with the dog was uneventful, but other than that it was almost solid unhappiness from 5 until 7.

I amazed myself with my ability to get out the door at 7:13. I even managed to water the tree and garden, which was borderline irresponsible and reckless parenting. Even with the car 89% packed, it was a ridiculous mad dash, all the more so because both kids were inconsolable.

Everything that went wrong with the girls before the trip went right during it, though. I am not exaggerating in the slightest: there was not one cry for the entire drive. Not one. Little troopers. They looked out the windows for a while, they had a snack, Lily had a bottle. Abby was down by Wyoming, Lily held on until much later, probably Sandstone.

I was sure they'd wake up on Midway. All three railroad crossings had me worried...I literally crossed my fingers every time I saw the white X on the road (nice...like the imagery?). Badaabump! Nothing. Even the gravel road, they stayed aslumberin'.

We pulled in around 10:20. Traffic was miserable, btw. Lily got out, and she was wide awake and hilarious. She would not stop laughing and playing with your parents, so ridiculously giggly. Abby buried her face in your mom's chest the entire time like the monkey that she is.

Abby went down with a bit of complaining, but Lily stayed riveted to wakefullness until midnight, when I finally forced her to go down. One sharp cry and she was down, where she has remained to this minute (it's 8:47am).

I was exhausted. Finally I went to pour myself deservedly into bed, and found a big wet urine spot on the bed. Your parents obviously are trying to punk me by peeing on the bed. They claim it was an animal, and even have the audacity to claim it was ours, which truth be told is likely the case. Olly does get excited to come up here. I'm thrilled he chose the bed as an appropriate canvas to express himself. Anyway, the damage to the sheets was done, so I shrugged and climbed into the other side of the bed, making a mental note to try not to roll much before my brain finally gave up the ghost.

That's yesterday. Abby got up this morning at 5:30, and has been flirting with your dad for the better part of the morning.

Pictures will be taken, I hope. Be patient. Glad you got there safely. We love you.

d

Day ninety something, I have no clue.

ps. extra credit to whoever can guess the tv show I quoted in this post's title...